This was sent to me today. Apparently this CEO promised a free copy of his software to every American if one of a number of goals was met by George W. Bush by the end of his presidency. It was a clever viral marketing scheme that will probably end up being a poor business decision. The five goals were:
- Reduce the Price of Gas: Gas costs about $3.79 a gallon in the Twin Cities, a full buck more than this time last year. If the average price here drops below $2.79 per gallon, this goal is met.
- Reduce the Price of Food: With the rise of fuel prices has come a similar rise in food prices. A gallon of milk is about $5 these days. It was $3.50 a year ago. If the average price of a gallon of milk comes down to $3.50 gallon in the Twin Cities metro, this goal is met.
- Create More Jobs: We started the year with 138,002,000 people in the U.S. working non-farm jobs. Since then, total non-farm employment has decreased by 366,000. If so much as a single job can be created this calendar year – meaning if employment can be at least 138,002,001, this goal is met.
- Rejuvenate the Housing Market: Median home values in the Twin Cities have fallen 12 percent year over year – from $233,000 to $205,000. If that median returns to $233,000, this goal is met.
- Bring Osama Bin-Laden to Justice: Every American would like to see Osama Bin-Laden captured or terminated. We won’t be picky about how President Bush gets him. If it happens, this goal is met.
An excerpt from the CEO:
My fellow Americans. As you probably know by now, we recently succeeded in reaching one of our Lame Duck Presidential Challenge Goals . Of course, we reached it in perhaps the worst way possible–by destroying the world economy. And while ostensibly President Bush was to get the credit/blame for meeting our goals, the bottom line is that I cannot help but feel personally responsible for the greatest financial collapse since the 1930s.
How was I to know that President Bush would take my challenge so seriously? And, give the man credit, I didn’t think there was *any* way he could pull it off. But engineering a total market meltdown – wow – that was pure genius. I clearly underestimated the man.
I’m ashamed that I goaded him into this and take full responsibility for the collapse of any savings you might have. Please accept our free software as my way of apologizing for the global calamity we now find ourselves embroiled in. [Press Release]
I haven’t tried the software yet, but if this is true, I intend to, sounds pretty cool. The software apparently allows Mac users to run Windows applications without having to install Windows. Only problem is, I’m not sure why I would want to run a Windows application on my MacBook.